Sunday 28 December 2008

Who's creps?

Although i NEVER ever read fashion on blogs (pointless), while i was on my break at work i decided to go and find this so called Burger King in westfield... It DOES exist!!

I hardly go burger king so i took time to order! Finally i got my meal and sat down. As i was munching away, I saw one girl wearing pastry creps....They looked chong!!
If you're wondering what pastry's are. These two designed them:

(Angela & Vanessa Simmons)
& i fink they've just been launched in da UK recently

Ladies go cop a pair!!




Friday 26 December 2008

Fifa 09 DON

This will happen to guys if they want to challenge me!!!!

Challenge me!

Christmas day!

This years xmas was Funnnyy!
Before i get into much detail... I hardly watched T.v, But i DID watch Eastenders!

Ben tried to GROW WINGS!
& Susie HAD BARS UPON BARS

LOL

.....

Usually on christmas, we eat Jollof rice & turkey (fresh init), but this year my mum decided to stir up a traditional english christmas dinner. The whole shebang!! Carrots, broccoli, stuffing, gravy, roast potatoes, brussel sprout, that sausage fingy with bacon around it and of course turkey!

Obviously it was WENG!

Next on the agenda: christmas crackers.....my little brothers were on it!!


They wanted the yoyo and the pack of card bad!

I fink my mum was expecting visitors so she told them to have 1 each.

Did they get niced what they wanted???!!






NOPE! lol

..............


Xbox got destroyed!!! FIFA 09 AND MORTAL COMBAT VS DC UNIVERSE!!!
Chocolates got munched!!!

I basically sat on the xbox all day, slept then joked with the family.

Then the drama came! my younger brother tried to tell my dad we never let him play the xbox! so i hotted him..... long story short..... he knew he wernt gonna play even if he told. So he left me this message made from old scrabble letters:




Should i allow him???

Wednesday 24 December 2008

Work Work!

Work has been killing me recently (bare xmas over time!)....I aint had time for any fing!!! Not even revision!!!!!
........

With me i hate the build up to christmas BUT, I enjoy christmas day very much!! This year my family are staying at home. And as i mentioned before my family is BIG... It will be jokes, and i'll have alot to blog about, trust me!

Boxing day i'm not working, So expect new posts!!!!

Till then.....
























I just had to share this with you lot!! LOL











Lol Have A.......




MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Not another one!

Another retail shop to go bust!!!! I swear Wolworths inspired guys lol.

I was just watching the news and apparently, they wont even be selling the christmas number 1 album, which is That that's - The Circus. (Who wants that anyway!)
I've been Zavvi ONCE, and that was to buy 140 grime st (only because HMV was packed!)

I aint got much too say about this....but that is bare sad!!...

Monday 22 December 2008

On my way... Vol 2

On a LATE night after work, i boarded a slyly packed central line with a couple of hard workers (click here if you dont know what i mean about hard workers).

A couple of stops went by, and a man got on and sat beside me. Lol, this man slept str8 away! Then, as i was about to conk out too, i saw something in his hand:


A STRIP MUG?!

I was a bit scared because if i'm not mistaken, that is a dude on the cover!!!

Then i read the description:

"Pour in your hot drink and watch as their clothes vanish"

......Wow! What don't they sell!!!
This experience made my journey faster! And i was bare happy when he got off!!
The thing i see these days!

Sunday 21 December 2008

"Can i get a Big mac meal, sprite NO ICE!!!"

If you've been westfield, you'll know that there is NO Kfc or Mc Donalds (rumour has it that there is a burger king about doe). So, i head down to Sheppards Bush (on the other side of westfield) to eat.


One hungry day after work, i took a trip to Mc Donalds. There was no queue surprisingly, i thought " lemme quickly go toilet n wash my hands, b4 i munch!" . I got to the toilet, and to my amazement look what i saw in the urinal!!



Ice.....ICE!!......ICE??
I was as baffed as the next guy! The funny thing is, that it is the same ice they use in the drinks!

What is going on?!?!........

People, remember to say no to ice!

Saturday 20 December 2008

What a Night!!!

Yesturday i went Kays Yard, Skeps and Nayta were about too. After kay beat them both in fifa, i thought " Lemme just HOT this guy!!" so i did Hold tite Kay (09 IS MY YEAR FAM!). LOL

After Jamming for a bit. We thought lets head out to that xmas dinner thing. So we made our way to Stratty. Top-up the ye ole Oystercards and jumped on the cente line, then the piccadilly line and got off at Piccadilly circus. We got out the station and thought "wheres this place man!". Hold tite Kay AGAIN, COZ HE FULLY SED HE KNEW WHERE THE PLACE WAS (Chinatown). lol. No-one had credit, so Skeps whipped out his contract phone (He's bill is gonna be cranked. lol) After a couple of calls, we were informed the dinner was cancelled. Us man were baffed and angry. It was a PAR. But then i thought, "we came out to eat chinese, so it would be a bigger par if we never munched!!" Skeps and Nayta wern't onit. So me and Kay thought f*ck it, and rolled Wings.....he bulldozed it!









(Some 0.19553 megapixal cam!!)

We were charged £11.95 for our meals, and we thought they tired to go on some next westend vibe.



But then i noticed this notice on the table:

WTF?! we're only in Mile End!!!

"If you're working the hardest and MONEY don't pop up in your thoughts your retarded!!!!"

Working in retail is stressfull!! Especially when ur travelling across london!!! (But tru-say if i never had this job i would be grindin hard!)

I go work twice a week, and i travel from zone 5 to zone 2. If you didnt know, that is serious oystercard money!!

But one thing i have realised is that work does actually make you extremely TY-YAD! So now when i see people conked out on the train i can relate, and i think to myself "this guy must have been working hard". (The guy on my previous post on my way...Vol 1 worked super hard!"

Today, i started work at 7AM. Which meant i had 2 wake up at 4AM and leave my yard at 5AM!! (plus i had a late night, all will be revealed in another blog). So as i made my way to the station. There was no bloody trains working, so i had to take a bus replacement, and that stupid bus took TIME!!! When i did get on the bus i joined the "Conking Crew". I slept on the bus, on the district line, on the central line, and exactly the same on the way back!



What have i learnt from this? Never to make fun out of people sleeping on the train, EVER!


Take a look at these hard workers!





Friday 19 December 2008

My parents...only fam get to hear

Couple weeks ago I read Julie's blog about her african parents episodes, many of us african can relate to the things our african parents say and do, and sometimes they might leave us STUNNED!

But, I wouldn't describe my parents as african (Is to broad)
There errmmmm....... "My parents"

My mum is the funniest person i know!! But the other day she called the house phone, Heres the convo we had.

Josh: Hello

Mum: Hello dear

Josh: Hi mum

Mum: Are you at home?

.................(PAUSE)..................








Lol, she is still the LIVEST MOTHER!!!

Thursday 18 December 2008

"I'm a hero....Like Nakamura!"

...Im not really, in fact I don't even watch heroes. Lol
but A LOT of people do (Kano, Ghetts....).

Even though I don't watch it, I've heard of and seen a couple of characters. But one extra-ordinary day, I came across a poster. I stopped... Looked at it.... Looked at the ground... Looked at it AGAIN....Then I thought to myself "this can't be right, or is it?"
Then I came to a solid conclusion that this is NOT THE LEGIT HEROES!!!!

























I wish I knew all the real characters names so I could say who these fake people are trying to be!

Here are the real heroes, you all know and love!



Catch them on T.V.... ...BBC 1 or 2 (i think) Let me know if i'm wrong

Wednesday 17 December 2008

What are YOU doing monday - friday from 6am to 9am?!?!

I've been parred bare times in my life, but when u start to get parred by your parents. Thats when you KNOW!

Ever since i moved into my house, my bedroom has been empty! And one thing it does not have, but the rest of the rooms do have (even the kitchen) is a T.V. My parents refuse to get 1 for my room!! (maybe thats why i do so well in exams lol)
Anyways i've been left with a radio (thank God its digital lol) and the station is forever on KISS 100. I've been listening for a couple of years and it has been jokes. There's been bare breakfast producers and the current ones are Ricky and Melvin........FUNNIEST GUYS

They make me laugh in the morning, member 6am - 9am if your tuned for a week and they dont make you laugh..........................................Listen again. If they still dont make you laugh youtube Eddie Griffin :)







www.totalkiss.com/breakfast

Check them out

"Omelette-Du-Fromage!!!"

I'm apart of a BIG family, so we see each other A LOT! It has its advantages coz at times we buss a lot of jokes.
Last Night my brother James ("i got 3 boys and all der names begin with a J, you know them ways"...skeppy!) was doing his french homework and was beggin me and my sister to help him by naming types of food. So my sister shouts out OMELETTE, lol. And immediately DEXTERS LAB came to my head!
Does anyone remeber that episode?... when all dexter could say was omelette-du-fromage...it was Jokess


If not, let me refresh ur memory (This vid was surprisingly easy to find)




Tell me the 90's never had da greatest cartoons!

"I'm calling from Internet service providings"

Fonejacker has me in stitches!!! But i aint gonna lie, there are some skits were i just think "this is air!"
Me and Rich have our guy, HE IS MAD JOKES

But this one is Funnyyy!!

On my way... Vol 1

(inspired by Ayo and Julie)

Taking the train every morning during rush hour is NOT pleasant; people pushing to get on, arguing, smells, annoying kids etc etc etc!!! Its all mad.

But one morning, i arrived at the station (same time), got on the train without all the hype. What do i hear?!?















ZZZZZZZZ......



Snoring!!

DIS GUY WAS GONEEE!!!!!!!

There was a seat next to him, but unless u wanted a head on your shoulder, your standing!

LOL. Actually there were two african people (i could blantantly tell) who tried to sit down, but this man was NOT WAKING UP FOR NO1!

heres the vid:

I forgot how the lady got to sit down! lol

"Theres no introduction needed....but w8, i'll still give u da intro!"

Now i've been living off blogs for a while; from Hyperfrank to Stryderman to Bashy's to Julie's .... (The list is endless!)
Like most of us, I was a fan of Hyperfranks blog UNTIL Friday the 19th of September 2008. The day she stopped.
I've never really been a fan of Grime Forum, so I thought to myself "Where am I gonna get info about grime now??"..... Lucky for me i found a few grime artist blogs (T. Stryder). Then i found bashy's blog and started from around the time hyperfrank abandoned us.

Hes blog was LIVE.......I HAD 2 TELL SOME 1

So I told rich... he said, "you should read Julie's blog, its Live". I said kool, send me da link
So I went on it..... It was live, from then on, doors were opened and i started to EXPLORE!!

Many of my friends started blogging.... Now here i am!

ENJOY
;D